I wish life was like a box of chocolates.

Life isn't always like a box of chocolate Forrest. Sometimes, you know exactly what you're going to get. When you change your thought to an action, sometimes you know exactly what's coming next. Just a thought that has slapped me in the face today. (: I'm kind of exhausted due to the almost all nighter that myself and Rachel pulled the other night. I'm so excited for my Senior year and just embracing everything that is going on around me. People are changing as am I and I love that. I love that talking about what college I'm going to is a real reality right now and that I have to start thinking about things such as that. AHHHH!

So, today I'm watching a movie called Hall Pass. In which these two bestfriends give their hudsbands "hall passes" for a week which means that they get to take a week vacation from being married. In turn, they can sleep with who they want and so on and so forth. Excuse me? No, never. EVER. Of course, the movies turns out where the main guy can't cheat because he loves his wife way to much and he knows that he never wants anyone else. Which is what I hope would happen but I would never in a billion years give my husband a hall pass and it makes me sad to think that anyone thought to make a movie like that. Disturbing to anyone else?

This stupid blog of mine never has one thought per blog and it makes me laugh. (: I just up chuck a bunch of words and thoughts, it's me though. My left boob is much bigger than my right one. HA! Okay, I'm falling out.


"You're assaulting all my senses, from your smell to your sentences."(:

You'd think It'd be a Dream

It's not. I'm just saying, in fact it's quite the opposite. It's a nightmare. I know you have no idea what I'm talking about and that's fine. I'm not going to say anymore than that it's a straight up nightmare. Go listen to "Oh, Tonight" by the Josh Abbott Band. Yeah....

All I want..

All I want out of love (yes, love not life) is to find someone who doesn't care that I never wear shoes when I don't absolutely have to, that I'm pretty incapable of sitting still, that I can't grasp the concept of doing anything without procrastinating first, that I laugh at every wrong time, and some of the stupidest things mean the entire world to me, and that I refuse to be ladylike. Someone who realizes that about half the decisions I make I'll probably regret, and that I have the right to overreact sometimes. Someone who understands that I'm completely goofy and very rarely do I ever feel the need to censor my words, that there's a reason behind every move I make, that doesn't mind taking me fishing and frog giggin'. I want someone who realizes and understands that I'm completely insane but wouldn't want me any other way...


Nobody ever will probably..(yes, let me sulk, please and thanks)

a surrendered Kaitlin

Two weeks until I'm headed for the BEACH!

So, I deleted my last entry for the simple fact that I realized after re-reading it that no one really cares about what I was talking about. lol All I was trying to get at is that I love my job, entirely. I feel like I'm on an emotional rollar coaster. All In all it's a very happy and content ride. Then out of no where I wake up from a dream of Molly, or I hear that one song on the radio that makes me think of Justin and I lose it. Stupidity. Although, I will say that I decided that I'm getting better at going with the flow of things (: It's a relief. I'm just wanting to have fun this summer, just forget everything and laugh until I cry, and drive with my top down, and write till my hands fall off, and sing until my voice goes out completely. I cannot believe I am a senior, and that this is IT. Thirteen years of public education and here we are...I'm cherishing every moment. 18 years of life! More than any other age, this age is the age I'm most excited about turning up to this point in my life. 16 was awesome, and 13 seemed like the biggest deal ever at the time, but looking back and looking ahead...this is it. & not because I will be able to go to clubs (although thats a nice thought) its also that I will finally be looked at like someone who can actually do something...anything. Yes, I'm not an adult, and I won't consider myself one. But..that idea of being able to say I'm a citizen and not just a student of society is very exciting to me. I'm done rambling for the day I suppose.

I've never done this before..

& I hoenstly don't know how to. I've never had to try at something like this before and I agree with my bestfriend, I'm so afraid that I am going to try and it's gonna end like crap. Anyways, work is extremely slow but I got my braces off and all the guys are excited for me! Gene said that I went a bracket on the hot scale. He said I went from being cute to being a hot babe. Haha, yes he's old, and yes, it's gross. But still, I'll take whatever compliments I can get at this point. :3 I'm going home tonight after work and I'm going to relax and hope that tomorrow goes like it's supposed to. (: I get to meet with my incredible grandma for lunch at applebee's (: She makes me smile beyond what she knows. I love her so much. My family is such a blessing. I could never name every blessing I have in this world but I can tell you right now the ones that are being thrown in my face everyday these days are my family, my bestfriends, my job, and My Jesus. < 3 Okay, well I need to get off here and at least act like I'm doing something productive. Haha, even though the guys know that I never do anything productive. I don't know why they love me so much. haha GOODNIGHT!

Kait :3

These days are something new.

I've never been so inspired to write in my entire life. Words are flowing out of me onto the paper like crazy. Emotions in writing, in black ink, in raw honesty. It's like I was hit with something enormous on my head and woke up with a entirely new outlook on the way life works and how to live it. My date last night went extremely EXTREMELY well, < 3 I'm afraid to say I'm falling. I'm afraid that those feelings aren't in complete return, but I always say "breathe deep & love strong". I cannot wait to get my tattoo of that. So, I've been incredibly wrapped up in the question of what my friends and family would have to say about me if I died tomorrow...obviously, there's inspiration behind that question, I'm not just saying that because I'm emo or something. I just truly wonder, because I know, say, and hear the amazing things that Molly left behind. OH, total 180 here buuut, this 63 year old guy came into the dealership today and wrote a check for a 62,000 dollar vehicle for his 23 year old girlfriend with GIGANTUIN ta-ta's. I was astounded. (: Only an hour and ten minutes left until I'm off work and head down to my father's house in duncan to stay the night. I'm extremely glad rachel's coming with me. You know it's one thing to know in your heart how incredibly blessed you are by the Lord, but it is a totally other thing to actually experience it. :3 just saying!

"If you'd just realize, what I just realized then we'd be perfect for each other and we'd never find another. Just realize what I just realized and we'd never have to wonder if we missed out on each other now. But it's not the same, no it's never the same if you don't feel it too. If you'd meet me halfway, you could meet me halfway. It could be the same for you."


Signed,
a indifferent Kait...

A big ol' dent in my senior summer.

Well, when it rains it pours. That's all there is to it. Life is incredible at the moment and is completely screwed up at the moment. I have a blessed life, more than I realize everyday. Today, this morning actually, I went to the funeral of my amazing very close friend Molly Ann, of 17 years old. She's forever 17 in her hometown and is gone...and although I'm broken and searching for strength and answers, I know that for her, I'm going to live this year right, and this life..I'm going to live it right.

On a happy note, I have a date tonight with an adorable man, and I'm hoping that it goes even more smoothly than I have it all planned out in my head. (YEAH RIGHT) But I'm excited, and I'm ready. I know that my best friends are more than I've ever deserved, ever. I have amazing teachers that took time out of their schedules to comfort me and hug me this morning when I was at one of the lowest points I've ever been. I have a lot on my mind, but nothing that my Jesus isn't giving me a peace about.

I've gotta watch my dr. phil before I go to work, so I'm shutting up for now. You can guarantee though, that tomorrow I will put every detail of my date on here. Just for safe keeping of the memory (:


new life begins...NOW.

Kait